I had the BEST Birthday!


My Birthday was the 16th, and I thought it would be just a little thing where Jay bought me a digital camera or something. I would have liked that too, but he did a very nice afternoon of elegance!

He was gone all morning, and I was left with the kids and housework... I had very little sleep the night before, so I was perturbed that he wasnt around to help out. BUt then he came and got me to take me out.

First, we went to the mall and he bought me some Lancome makeup...I have NEEDED makeup for a long time...
Then, we went and got my hair cut...he loves it short (To the top of my shoulders). Then we went to my mom's condo where he surprised me with a beautiful Jessica rabbit sparkly red dress with a long black velvet coat.

He also bought me a small sequined black purse with a beautifull black chain and rhinestone earings and neclace, along with some other stuff. I was overwhelmed! He bought the right size and I had many compliments over the night.

The, he took me to a very nice Italian Restaurant in NW Portland and after, we saw Harry Potter 2. It was a very nice evening, and he was such a gentleman. :-)

Well... I'm 26 now. Over the hump.
Cant wait to finish moving...
-Jyn

I was going through my ePregnancy Journal back from my pregnancy with Daniel.... I can't believe it's over.

I am such a sap. For the four years I have been pregnant, I loved being pregnant. Daniel's pregnancy was especially hard, but the birth was so simple and quick, unlike the girls birth.

I know I didnt mention it after I had him... I took time off to be with him.

Basicly, this was my birth story:

It started out on the 21st of July, 2002, the day after my due date, at about 2:00 am which was when I went to bed. When I checked I was still a little over 1 centimeter dilated (yes I am able to check myself by now), 80% effaced like I had been for weeks. I, a few weeks earlier, had some false labor which really teased me since I was so ready to have him and so afraid of being induced again.

I woke up at about 5am, because I was uncomfortable and achy like always, and I went into the bathroom to see if there was any change. I could tell I was about 2 centimeters, and I smiled and just walked circles around my room in the dark.

My brother had come over the night before to hang out with us since it was the weekend, which is pretty common, so he was asleep in the livingroom.

I could tell the contractions were about 15 minutes appart, and I called the delivery room to ask whether or not it was okay to bear down, since it just felt good on those muscles to do so. The nurse told me not to , that I could engorge the uterus and cause problems, so I didn't but we talked for about 45 minutes longer.

In that period of time, my contractions became a little heavier and she told me I should probably start getting ready to come in. Really, I just wanted to have him here, but I knew that wasn't safe and who knew what would happen? Jay had woken up while I was chatting with the nurse, and heard me talking about getting my stuff together that I was probably in labor, so he just layed there and talked with me a bit while I grabbed some extra things. I know I smiled a lot because I was so excited, and then we got the girls together.

We probably got out the door at about quarter to nine, after calling my friend who would be videotaping, and my mom, and others... the contractions hurt a little more, but they were still bearable and I felt like, who knew how long this could take?

We finally reached the hospital and walked into it, and up to the sign in. I came right in and they called the midwife on duty. I must have been in the hospital for 15 minutes before she came, and I told her I was considering an epidural before it got too bad, but I would try the bath first, since you cant be out of bed with an epidural. She checked me and I was already 3 centimeters dilated.

Now, mind you, both of my girls I was induced with for one reason or another, so this was the first time I went into labor naturally, and it was not what I expected.

I went into the tub, and my midwife came in and we talked. She breathed with my through my contractions, and we just kept chatting about how my other births were. The bath felt so good, I think I only had about 6 contractions but 45 minutes later, I started to feel back labor, and I was really uncomfortable. The midwife checked and I was already a 10! He was coming and they DRAGGED me out of the tub, threw on my gown, and dragged me down the hall to my room. They didnt allow water births there.

I climbed into my bed on my hands and knees and just concentrated... I remember how uncomfortable I was and I just kept begging for an epidural. I finally turned over and I felt my body heave... I didnt push or hold my breath...my body just heaved little daniel out... he was born within 14 minutes. The girls were there and Jay held them up so they could see his head crowning and his body come out.

All I remember is pain, but I looked so calm they werent afraid. The midwife set Daniel on my chest, even before suctioning his mouth, and I held him to my bare chest, patted his back and he looked around at me, at my girls around the room...didn't cry!

He was so perfect.


I think the worst part were my afterpains, or when your uterus is still contracting down. It was like I was still in labor and they had me on pain meds the whole time there.
But boy, I dont know... I need to let my body rest, but I am not ruling out having more kids in the future. :-) My little blessings.
-Jyn

Have I ever Mentioned...
How much I love to cuddle Gracie? She is totally my little teddy bear. I worry for her because she already showes low self esteem, and I try as hard as I can to let her know how much I love her and think she's beautiful.


I really do.




I know she is a little chubbier than Abbie, but she is my little sweetheart.
She came and cuddled me on the couch this morning, and took a lock of my hair and was feeling it between her fingers. She is so worried about what Abbie is doing all day, You ask Abbie what she likes most of a movie, and she tells you... Grace, has to have it be the same thing... how can I help her understand I love her so much for who SHE is... not for how much she is like Abbie?

-Jyn

blogs by women
This site was really interesting, so I joined today.
It's a blogger webring site for women, and welll... I am just such a sucker for all those women things :-) .

Tonight we have a meeting with one of the men and his wife from our Church at 7:00 pm. This should help us in our money management problem and with some marital problems. Hey, we all have them dont we?


I spent most of yesterday in Target with all of the kids shopping for the stuff we needed. It took me over four hours to get everything and we got home on the fifth hour. I am broken... even today.

But... I got my grandmother a birthday present. I feel so proud...been a long time since I have been able to do that.

I was just mentioning to my friend how addicted I have become to this thing. It's like, I cant think of anything great without having to write it in here. Wouldnt it be so cool if we had a portable blogger, where we could just whip out our little thingy and write in what it is that is so great, and it posts?
Oh, I would be so happy.... A portable part of my brain that is always malfunctioning...my memory.
So, today I need to concentrate on packing.
That must be why I havent touched a thing.....
-Jyn

I am starting to wear down...

Jay took me to go see that house I didnt want to see yesterday after church.

It was beautiful.

Not only that, but the gal showing it to us was nice too. We must have talked for 2 hours.

I dont know how crazy I am at paying $1400 a month for a place to live, but for this house it's worth it. And it would be us buying it.

Tomarrow is the big check and Jay is going to Santa Clara on a business trip.

Think he'll let me go shopping?

Who knows........?

-Jyn

B R I A N :

You have quite the reading to do! I have realized that by having this neat little convenient blogging link in my browser interface, I can jot down any idea, regardless of how insain or retarded it may seem later.... I was brilliant to me then. *smile*

THIS will teach you to dare challange the word count of Jyn Meyer's Blogger, aha!

Anyway, been a while since we have seen you ... will you ever bless us with your wisdom again?

-Jyn

Lifestyles of The Rich & Homeless

I have come to the realization that although Jay may be making a lot of money, we might not get accepted for a new place to live because our credit is so shot.

I'm frusterated by this, but most of all because he insists on continuing to look for homes to live in and we are running out of time.

I have also realized that I am a lot pickier now that we have more of a selection and an actuall choice in the type of places we live in. You would be amazed at all the new developments that are popping up around here with tons of earthy colors and designs....

"... and they all have ticky-tacky and they all look just the same..."

-Jyn

Virtually Arrange Your Room

I was looking for some links on saving space and organizing furniture. These came up at Better Homes & GArdens. Pretty handy, you should just try it out and see how you can arrange your room....

-Jyn

From Poor to Rich in a Day....

What are we to do once we get that big check? It's not "found" money. It's been earned. BUt it's still more that I could have ever imagined us making in 2 weeks.

Jay is more used to it because he knows that is what he's worth. But me? Never even thought of it until now.

Why does money scare me so much?

Maybe it has something to do with familiarity. It's been "abnormal" to be making money, therefore I am so unused to it, it's frightening to think I will have to learn a new way of life. Then again, who says I should have to change my meager lifestyle?

To me, money upgrades the problems not solves them.

-Jyn

This is a vent I wrote yesterday after an awfull small child errand run:

I HATE, going out by myself...

UGh.

This is why I am home all day:

Our apartment managers called today to tell us that they will not accept a check from us anymore.
Mind you, earlier, they decided to deposit both a deposit check we wrote five months earlier, AND our rent at once, which bounced both checks. Some of it was the bank's fault, but the apartment managers didn't care, and they put us on a "no check" status.

So, Jay had written them a check, needless to say they couldnt accept it, so they gave me a call. They told me if I was to bring them in a money order by 6:00pm, we wouldn't get a late fee assesed.

Oh.... thanks.

So, anyway... I am in the middle of downloading a 500 MEG file for the SECOND time in two days, and my mother needed this picture of her e-mailed to a publisher of her's.... today.
I waited as long as I could for the download to finish..and my computer crashes. Crap.

"Fine." I say to myself, boot it back up (I love my MAC), e-mail out the picture and look at the clock.
It's 4:30... the bank closes at 5.

Oh yeah, and I forgot...the girls had cleaned out my purse with my license included... I had no idea where the stupid peice of plastic was.

Oh well, I gotta' at least try to get that money order.
So I head on out... traffic.
I get to the bank at 4:58.
The girls are all over the bank, I am trying to round them up AND confirm my personal info at the same time.
We get the money, and I stuff everyone back into the car.

Now, I could have just bought the money order there, at the US Bank, but they charge around $5 for the thing.

Off to Albertson's to get the money order.

Lots of traffic, the girls are crazy and space cases...
I am having a hard enough time keeping them next to me while walking across the parking lot with Daniel's carrier on my arm.

We get into the store, and oh look! How nice, they put all the millions of different candies next to the customer service counter. Thanks.
The girls are looking around with greed in their eyes showing each other all the candies they are not going to get.

I finally get the order, but not before Daniel pukes all over himself and laughs about it.

So, I round the girls up again, and we head on out the door. Grace is a total spaceoid... walking a few steps and looking everywhere BUT where she NEEDS to be walking... walking into the side of displays...just not paying attention.

"Um, Grace? We are going... are you coming too?"
"Yeah."
"Okay....we are going this way.... Grace..... Pay attention!"

So, just before super gluing the girl's hands together, they hold each other nicely, and we are out the door. I say to them, "Now pay attention! There are a lot of cars out." (it was dark and rush hour...lots of cars and a small parkinglot).

So just after we step off the curb when it was clear, around the corner comes a car, and the woman wasn't even looking ourway.

We are in the middle of the street- a mom with a carrier on her arm, and two toddlers at her side wide eyed- she is in a humoungus Suburban not paying attention.

If I dont say something now, we will lose.

"HELLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" I shout.
"EXCUUUUUUUUSSSSSSE MEEEEEE!!" And she hits her brakes. Both herself and her passenger are heafty looking people. Her passenger happens to have his window down, and as we toddle by I say,
"You know, you need to be paying closer attention! I had to scream at you before you saw us and you ALMOST ran us over..."

She shouted soomething at me as she drove off, I didn't hear because of the loud ringing sound of blood rushing in my ears I was so pissed.

I should have sworn some obsenity at her, but I'm not like that.

The girls are screaming for McDonald's, and they cry because I did not let them climb in the Jeep themself.
"If you dont hush, " I say "then you wont get ANY McDonald's!"
They pout and continue to chime in unison, "Fwench fwies, Fwench fwies, Fwench fwies, Fwench fwies, Fwench fwies, Fwench fwies....."
I am crazy.

It takes 4 minutes sitting in the Albertson's driveway with my blinker on to pull out with a long line of cars behind me because people dont know how to NOT block an intersection when it's rush hour.

I run through McDonald's and sit there. Our McDonald's has two drivethrough teller lines, and then you merge into one to pay and get your food. Four cars are helped in the line next to me, and drive past me to get their food.

"EXCUSE ME...."
"Oh, Hello? Hi, welcome to McDonald's may I take your order..."

I FELT like saying, "What the heck are you doing in there? Playing cards? You could have TAKEN my order four minutes ago, but now I am just GIVING it to you..."
We get our food and the girls hound me for it all as I swerve off trying to drive.
What time is it now? It is 5:45.

Crap.
I rush home, and give the managers the money orders just in time.
I felt like saying, "Good riddance that I have to go through all this fricken HELL for your stupid MONEY ORDERS for the LAST TIME! *Smoke billowing out my nose*"

... but I didn't.

And I am here and I am happy and safe and never want to go out again! NEVER!

-Jyn

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You know, I am beginning to feel that tug...

My mother is really irritated with me.She thinks I downplay myself compared to Jay.Well... uh... duh, he makes more money than I and poops creative like he ate it for breakfast.

I dont think I'm a bad artist, I just dont proclaim myself to be anything special yet.

I'm just Jyn.

But that tug is still there. I want to go out and DO something with myself other than being my molish self in my hole.
People dont understand how hard it is to be seriousely creative with three children under 3 .... sometimes, their creativity makes me howl in laughter... Abbie's little monster faces she draws all over the place.

That child cannot stand whitespace... two round eyes, a round filled in nose, with that line lip and LOOOOOONg straight teeth, lol!

She even drew him in her friend's closet...HAHAHAHA, the monster in the closet... she's gunna be something, but definately not a hairdresser. After her shenanigans with the scissors, Gracie now looks like Joe Dirt.

In memory of her new hairstyle, Jay put on the movie.( Yeah, we happen to own it.)

But who can paint when your children always wanna try or you find your supplies in every room.... for now, I am just going to live vicariousely through Jay... and do my own thing in my web world.

-Jyn

This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to
McDonald's in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

NAME: Greg Bulmash.

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM

LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas
with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF
YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.

Well, it's funny how you feel like you are just barely hanging on, and then you, slowely but surely, overcome each of your hurdles.
I mean... talk about cutting it close!
Jay's First "REAL" Check will be on the 12th of November...four days before my birthday.
For now, we are out of diapers for all kids, and toilet paper...gas for the car (lots of gas for us, thank you) and almost out of time to find a new apartment.
We found a multitude of diapers in the car for both the girls and Danny, Jay swiped some TP from the Workout room (heh heh heh) and we have enough gas in MY car for Jay to get to work, etc.
Now, we just have to tackle our last rent check here and finding another place to live before the 30th.
Brian... have fun in school and TAKE YOUR DRUGS!
That's all I have to say. ;-)
-Jyn

Did you ever think about Cows?

Have you ever seen one out in the wild? What if we were to let one out in the wild... in the forest, in the jungle... what if they turned out to REALLY be carnivourous and hunted down other animals?

Carnivorous Cows.....

Well I have made it through the first two days back to school. (only a few hundred to go) It is difficult for me, I am still way to preoccupied with my past to be very normal. On the other side of the coin, I am doing something very good for me that come easily. As long as I can get my brain out of the past I think everything will be fine.

When....
will we NOT be broke?

Hmmmmm... who cares whineymore.
:-)
-Jyn

For the life of me I cant remember who sang this song... even with the words... maybe you could email me and let me know...Who sang this song?.

Wow, today was sure eventful, I spent the day helping my buddy Bobby do this and that. Seems I have all the time in the world for my friends, and about 0 for me. Oh well, sometimes living through other people is fun, if not productive. Don't have a lot to blog about, other than I am hoping my school will take me back tommorow when I go in, my kewl brother is paying for that too. Will wonders never cease! Oh well, hope everything is good out there in blogland for jyn and all. Take care net fiends.

Well, since I can't seem to get up the steam to blog in my own blog, I will be obtuse and blog in my buddies! No more Stanfords! I just got back from there, and I tell you what, a 25 dollar steak is about as useful to me as a 2.50 round steak at Safeway. But I did get a few beers, as well as a few good minutes with my brother, who I will admit is a king. He took me out tonight and spent about 120 dollars on us at the resuarant, and the bar of course! :>) Sometimes brothers are just great!

Well, I am sick of my EPS (eternal Pregnancy Syndrome).

I should not have any more pregnancies at least for a few years, not to mention we cant afford another one right now.

Ugh, Calgon.... take me awaaaaayyyyy....

Isn't it interesting how things happen?

You kow, I was thinking about how smoothly a lot of things would fit together if this or this would fall through.

The appartments we are looking at- they have a great price going for a 3 bedroom, and it's close to Intel which would be perfect if Jay got the job.

Plus, they offer T1 acess for $35 a month, would would be perfect for MY web business. How could this fail?

There are a lot of ways as I have found.

It just irritates me how life could tease us in such a way.

Follow My Yellow Brick Road

I can't believe how cheap 2mhostis. I just can't get over it. They are neat people, they just need a good spell checker. $1.50 a month with everything you just can't beat. Another neat site is Mac.com which has a lot of itools for those who have anti-money. I have to say that there are WAAAAAAY too many assets for people to use from the net to see these hockananny pages people design with multicolor font, 40 animations, and a MIDI of Chariots of Fire. I am not limiting this to actuall pronounced web designers of that same caliber. These people make money? Some I have noticed think that because they have a web design program from Microsoft that offers templates, they can design other people's sites and charge for them as a professional.

As far as web production goes, you can't beat Macromedia. I drool over the MX suite, Flash MX, Dreamweaver MX, and so on. If you can manage to get Dreamweaver 4 at least, you can't pass up the Extension Exchange they offer. And going into the Designer's & Developer's section, visit the Tip of The Week. It's a nice Quicktime video with a tutorial tip to show you yet another cool feature of Macromedia's products.

I could go on forever, but considering Jay is bugging me to get myself ready to go tour a new apartment, I can't. For a family of five, a 2 bedroom apartment just doesn't cut it.

-Jyn

Well, Jay lost his wallet. It has his Montana driver's license in it which is very hard to replace considering we live in OREGON now. But his registration on his car is good for a while, we would have to buy new registration.

He THINKS he may have dropped it at a Burger King, but we are hoping if it was dropped... someone will come forth and return it. It seems like that is all we have been doing the past few months.

I found someone's birth certificate- tracked them down.

I found someone's car deed info- still trying to track them down.

Found someone's mangled phone that fell off their car- put up signs and returned it to them. The thing still works, too.

Oh, do me a favor? Pin your destination on our guest map!

Just click on the button below and pick your location and leave me a message. Pick out your icon and have it pinned there!

-Jyn

Wow, finally got it to work.
I have been so ADHD lately. It's the kind of mindframe that makes you want to look into what it would be like to be normal. Medicine maybe? I have been scattered considering I have fourty different things to do in different cattegories. But somehow, I have been able to manage it all.
Daniel is getting cuter every day. What is hard is juggling all I want to do with what I would LIKE to be doing with the kids. Daniel is at that "entertain me" stage and it's not always easy to do something different. His entertainments are very limited.
Other than that, Jay had an interview with Intel yesterday. He has worked for them in the past, designed some packages for the Video phone and some other things... but after a four hour interveiw, he had BETTER have gotten that job.
It would solve so many problems.
-Jyn

Been a while since I have been able to get this up and running. Lets see if this works.
Well, still hasnt worked. Maybe it will eventually.
-Jyn

getting close.
Been cleaning like a madwoman.
i must be mad.
-Jyn

Sheesh, I feel like I am walking a tightrope. I barely slept last night with dreams my water broke in public... I guess I will have to resort to wearing 'Depends' the next few weeks just to spite myself.

Looks like work is rolling in for Jay. A top ad agency called him last night stating they had a lot of freelance work for him. He just happened to know the CD who called from previouse work. He's excited, though I dont think that singing about potty to our potty-training toddlers is the most bearable form to show it in.

Today, I wear the hat of "Taxi Driver". I was going to take my friend to the doctor, only her daughter is sick and her fiance will end up stealing my hat.
I wouldn't have minded, I have a pre-natal this morning anyway- and she REALLY needs that glass taken out of her hand.

Overall, I think it is quite entertaining being hugely pregnant and in public. People exclaim, "Wow! Two so young and another on the way! I guess your done now, right...."

"Ummmmmm.... no-o-o-o-o-o-o.... just need a break."

I think the shock therapy helped them realize that outwardly jumping to conclusions to a complete stranger can be dangerous to how you look.

Hey, I say, "Be open-minded...but not so open-minded that your brain falls out."

-Jyn

Today was very strange. I woke up early because I wasn't able to get comfortable coming back to bed after fixing Abbie who woke up at 7:00 and was crying for a bottle.
But I sure am sore. It feels like I am growing, and it's hurting my ribs and back. Along with this, we had both creditors call for the loans on our cars threatening to repo on Monday. We wont even get a check for anything until mid-next week.
So, Jay is thinking about just moving them somewhere else for now.
Happy thing is that our food card was renewed and we went shopping for food, yay!
Too bad neither one of us has the energy to put away the non perishables until tomorrow morning.

Week 34: I received a phone call from my sister last night. She needed a ride to attend her neurologist appointment, and I know how hard that can be anyway, on her own.

My mom covered the gas money and I picked my sister up early this morning. It's amazing how early the sun comes up now. I almost feel guilty for sleeping in 'till 8:00. But I was pleasantly surprised my back hasn't been hurting me as badly as it has the past week. I have been contracting all day, although I honestly can admit that I can't tell the difference between the Braxton Hicks and the baby moving, anymore.

I am so compact, I dont feel so pregnant, even although I only have a few weeks left.

My big problem is sleeping at night. I so look forward to going to bed at the end of the day, and actually- in the beginning and middle, too- but once I get there, I just feel like there is no way I will ever get comfortable.

I am scared to death of sleeping anything close to on my back after an experience I had last Saturday. Laying in bed reading for a while, propped up with some pillows, I somehow managed to cut off enough of my blood supply that I passed out.

Never had that happen laying down, before.

The maternity ward nurse explained it probably had something to do with the fact that my uterus is getting heavy enough to put too much pressure on my arteries. I had some abdominal stitching just before it happened, so that probably constricted the blood vessels even more. It was too crazy, I didnt even know what to think. For now, all I can think about is getting work and stability.